If you've read my previous posts or you know me personally, you are aware that when my son was born he spent 5 days in the NICU. The worst 5 days of my life.
I know many people who put their babies and young children in their bed. They put them there for the child's comfort, for convenience when nursing, or just to have them close by. It quickly becomes a habit and then you have a 5 year in bed with you. Before having a child, before becoming pregnant, I walked around saying "I will not put my baby in my bed". "I do not want my child to sleep with me". I was also opposed because as a child, I slept with my mom because I was afraid of the dark.
About 2 weeks into his life, only home a week I would say, Cooper came into the bed with me. When I put him in his bassinet he would cry. For some reason it broke my heart. I would lay with him on the couch or in the living floor. I would do whatever I had to do for him to sleep and be next to me. Within a few weeks, I accepted that I needed my son beside me. So for the past 3 months that is where he has slept. I comfort him. I kiss him. I watch him breathe. I quickly respond to any sound he makes.
Why did I do what I always said I wouldn't?
I've come to the conclusion that it was that week in the NICU that changed my heart. No one can really understand. I wish they could. I know that Cooper was not in a horrible situation, but he was in a place where I had to visit my own son. So when I got him home, I wanted him close.
There are two reasons I wrote this blog this evening. Number one: I needed to get it out. Number two: Never say you won't do something because you may just do it.
Next time: Transitioning to the crib...
When I was pregnant with C, I never imagined that I would support attachment parenting but I've come to discover that we all sleep better when she's in bed with us. Now, at two and a half, she makes it most of the night in her own bed (it's where she starts the night) and then ends up coming to snuggle with us sometime between 3:00 and 5:00 in the morning. On a personal level, I think it's helped us feel closer to one another. If you're looking for products that can help you safely have Cooper in your bed all night long term, they make a great extension to put on the side of your bed that's kind of like a bassinet so you and Cooper can sleep next to one another. :)
ReplyDeleteThank you :) Half of me wants him in my bed and the other half in his crib. I think there are advantages to both honestly. Parenting really is a learning experience day by day.
ReplyDeleteSebastian wouldn't sleep unless he was touching me, so he came into our bed at 2 months old, after sleeping on my chest on the couch for 6 weeks. I could NOT sleep on the couch any longer! We were uncomfortable with such a tiny baby in our bed, so we turned his crib into a co-sleeper, like the Arm's Reach Co-Sleepers. We took one of the long sides off the crib and pushed it up against our bed, we attached it to our bed frame by bungee cords from the mattress support of the crib wrapped around the rail of our bed under the box springs. We adjusted the height of his mattress to match our bed and I pushed his mattress all the way against ours and stuffed a rolled up blanket into the space between the other side and the mattress to hold it over. He had his own surface to sleep on, but was close enough that I could touch him at any time. He slept like that for just over a year. That's what worked for us to get some sleep for a while.
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